I often find myself blogging in my head. There is one topic that keeps popping up in my head so I’m finally going to blog about it.
Over the years I’ve had people say to me something like this “Just because you think your perfect…” “Ok we all can’t be as perfect as you…” or other comments similar to this. The thing that I always find interesting is I don’t think I’m perfect. I don’t think I’m even close to perfect. I could list my many faults and go on and on explaining why I’m not perfect, but that would be in essence seen as making excuses.
I have a feeling that people are confusing confidence for cocky. I’m not cocky I don’t think I’m better than other people. I don’t think that I have all the answers. I don’t think I’m perfect. But, I am confident. I know it may appear that I make quick decisions and stand by them. The minute people start talking to me about a topic my brain starts working on formulating an answer/response to the conversation. If I don’t give an answer right away, it means I’m still thinking about it.
Over the years, I’ve learned that I need to answer questions with confidence. When I was younger if you questioned an answer I gave you I would waver over my answer because I was always worried about giving the wrong answer. There were times when I knew it was right, but someone else questioned me and I ended up changing my answer because I wasn’t confident in myself.
There were some major changes that I made in my life in my high school years, these changes could be a whole blog post on their own. One of these changes was to change schools. At this point I decided to redefine who I was. I decided that I would not let people walk all over me. I would not waver in my decisions. I would listen to the facts, form and answer and give it with authority. Does this mean that I knew my answer was always right…. no! Did I get upset if I had to debate facts or explain my thinking… no, actually I enjoy doing that. I have no problem agreeing to disagree with people.
Over the years, I have perfected this side of me. I live my life in a way that say I am who I am. I always feel like “Love me or hate me… it’s up to you, but I am who I am” Now again this doesn’t mean I’m not flexible, that I can’t or won’t change. It just is a feeling of I’m in control of who I am.
It has helped me in my job as a teacher. I am a strong child advocate and will fight for the children in my class, and others if I see it needed. I learn the standards, I know what I need to teach and will debate you on the appropriateness of the activities in my classroom. I can defend what I do, why I do it, and back it up with fundamentals of teaching.
This is also the way we are raising our sons. We have given them a voice in our family. They know there are times when it’s… No, you will do this. But, they are able to voice their thoughts and opinions. There are times when we debate issues and they prove us wrong. I know there are times where they have questioned teachers at school. We just tell them they have to back it with facts. A good example of this. Colby was learning about space in science last year. The science book said that the sun is a yellow star. Colby told his teacher the book was wrong because he had read in a book written by Ken Jennings that said that the sun was a white star. His teacher said she believed the science text book over the words of a Jeopardy player. Colby came home that day annoyed because he knew he was right. He asked to go on his computer and he Googled the facts. He did find on many scientific sites that the sun is a white star. He then e-mailed these links to his teacher. The next day, the teacher shared these facts with the class. She was impressed that he was able to argue this fact with facts and not emotion.
So, does confident mean cocky…. I don’t think so, but if you want to debate with me over it, I’m game!