As a mother, it is hard to see your child hurting. It doesn’t matter if this hurt is physical, emotional or other. As a parent we want to “fix” what is wrong, but this isn’t always possible. We also need to learn that the best way to fix things is to do nothing. Well not nothing nothing, but nothing. We need to be there when they want to talk. We need to support and give advice. But, we can’t fix things for them, they need to learn to do this on their own.
The older my sons get the more I realize that the best parenting moves involve me giving suggestions and then backing up. We need to let them figure things out on their own. I will never be a helicopter parent. I won’t do that disservice to my sons. I’m not saying that there aren’t times when I step in, but these are fewer and fewer. I want my sons to know that I’m there for them, but that I trust them to stand on their own two feet.
So, I will keep listening. I will keep discussing. I will send them to their father for help. I will guide, but I will not fix… they can do that themselves.